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My original blog - I have moved to http://shannonclark.wordpress.com so this remains only as an archive.
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Searching for the Moon
by Shannon Clark
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Friday, June 28, 2002
Bubble Manifesto
This is perhaps the single best, or at least most memorable piece of writing I have recieved online to date. A tad dated now, but still resonates when I read it.
6/28/2002 03:45:00 PM
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I have been online and active for a very long time. Here is a link back into my distant past. The FutureCulture mailing list was founded in 1991 or so (I was one of the early members) and morphed many times. Here is one of the remaining archives.
Not sure how many of my posts survive in the archives - I will try to find them one of these days.
FutureCulture
6/28/2002 03:43:00 PM
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Fireworks part 1
Nope not that type of fireworks... I just sent out an invitation to bunch of my friends here in Chicago (and to a few who live nearby and might be lured to Chicago for a fun event) to join me in watching the July 3rd fireworks in Grant Park. Hopefully a number of people will be able to make it and join me in picnic, concert viewing, and fireworks gazing - along with about a million of our closest friends and neighbors.
Yes, it is a large crowd, but with a group it is a very fun experience.
I hope, however that it is not a repeat of one similar outing I planned the summer after my senior year in high school. A very large group of us made plans to go to the fireworks together, all told I think almost 30 peopel were expected. Would have been a great time and one of the last times the group of us from high school would do something together.
Would have that is... I did not make it, nor did a couple of my friends who also planned on going. We were all working as summer research interns at Argonne National labs (which was overall a very cool experience, I disassembled a particle accellerator, I helped with an accellerator run, and saw the famous white deer who live at Argonne).
Anyway, it was July 3rd and we were driving home from work, and Chad (the driver) ran a red light. In his defence, it was the second of two lights that were positioned immediately after each other in a rather odd location. We started what became a four car pile up. Miraculously other than Chad's Ford Escort, no one was hurt.
It did make me a firm believer in wearing seatbelts, as without the seatbelt I would have flown into the windshield (and perhaps through it).
Needless to say, but I will say it anyway, we missed the group outing as we were stuck in the police station waiting for Chad's parents to pick us up. His car was completely totaled.
So, heres to hoping that history does not in the least repeat itself, rather, this time I am planning on a fun evening with friends in the park. Will be meeting the first group (early crowd) at 5:30 across from the old Goodman theater, we will then carve out a space in the field by the music shell and enjoy a picnic, the summer evening, and music and fireworks. I may, if I am brave and have brave companions, try to get some food from the surrounding Taste of Chicago, but may well forgo that "pleasure" if the crowds are as insane as they often are.
6/28/2002 01:26:00 PM
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Thursday, June 27, 2002
Sailing the night away
Last night a business partner of mine invited me to join him on his son's boat. He invited me at just after 5, we were to meet at his condo building and then drive up to the harbor. I left work early, and managed to join him only a few minutes late (as it turned out this was not a problem). I ate a not-so-good hamburger from Burger King so as to have had at least some food, my lunch was small.
We drove up to the harbor and met up with his sons, they told us to go get a drink and they would call us when the boat was ready, they had stuff to clean up before we could launch.
So we went the "Yacht Club" and got a drink and talked for a while about business. The "club" was not what I had envisioned, looked more like a community center than a fancy club, fake leather couchs, flimsy tables and stacking chairs, a bar out of the 1970's and a food serving area from the same era (they have food available apparently, not very appetizing looking however). Somewhat strange environment, with the photos of old greying men on the walls (the "commondantes" I think).
However it was a productive business meeting, as I suspected that it would be.
Finally we got on the boat - after a small scare when my cell phone came tumbling down as I was getting on, luckily it landed on the boat and not in Lake Michigan.
The boat itself was very impressive, it was over 30 feet long, sleeps 5, with a cabin area big enough to stand up in, and tons of little nooks and crannies to store stuff. In fact, on of my business partner's sons who owns the boat will be taking it on his honeymoon - he and his wife will sail it down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico and then on to Florida, they plan on living and working in Florida for a while (living on the boat) and then plan in about a year or so on sailing up the coast, through the St. Lawerence river and then down the Great Lakes back to Chicago (assuming that they don't just find someplace to stay and live).
Sailing was very cool, and very fun. Especially since as I was in the company of three experienced sailors, all I did was sit and look back at the Chicago Skyline, or at the many other boats out on the lake enjoying the weather and the evening.
Some boats were racing, forming lines of sailboats, all of the same size and basic shape, moving across the horizon.
All in all, not a bad way to spend an evening at all - not very "productive" as such, but certainly a lot of fun, relaxing, enjoyable, and freeing. I hope I get invited back before the long journey begins (though my partner's other son also has another boat, albiet a slightly smaller one, which is currently docked on land - so even when this big boat leaves town they will probably have a boat in the water.
My life is picking up speed it seems - more stuff to do, more people to do it with, and more interesting stuff at that. Bodes well for the rest of the summer. My next big "thing" is getting a group together to watch the fireworks here in Chicago on the 3rd, and probably to first listen to the free concerts in the park and partake in the massive amounts of food available at the Taste of Chicago. All activities much more enjoyable with a big group - my current plan is to meet up with one group of people and grab space on the lawn - then people can go get food and drink in smaller groups and reassemble, as well, people who arrive late can phone somoene's cell (probably mine) and learn where we are camped out - should be fun whether I get a few friends or dozens of friends and friends of friends.
6/27/2002 12:40:00 PM
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Tuesday, June 25, 2002
Late nights, random thoughts
Well I am here at the office til too late once again. Not a great habit that I am, certainly not getting much written of my own since after I leave here in a few minutes, I will have to get dinner and get home (walking). I have food at home, but at this hour I am so hungry I will probably stop somewhere on the way so as to eat that much sooner, with this late hour (almost 10:00pm) that means that I will probably be eating so-so take out chinese, not the healthiest food around.
Why do I do this?
For one, it is quiet here at night, and I get a fair amount done (though tonight that meant playing games - but it was all in the name of research, really). I am serious about that, I am helping a friend who may be starting an gaming company, so tonight I was researching an online game site (well a couple of them) - I even wrote up my analysis for him in a long email.
One reason I stay late is that I arrive late.
I arrive late because I wake up late.
I wake up late because I go to sleep late (okay, early in the morning).
I go to sleep late because I was not tired, often because I had too much food and coffee too late at night.
I eat so late at night because I don't get out of the office until late - and so the cycle has started.
Last night I did, in fact a lot of stuff - I read hundreds of pages of government documents (okay, skimmed most of them). This I did at a local cafe (and yes, I drank coffee). I left there at around 2:00am, I then did my laundry at home and did not get to bed until around 4:00am.
This is a pattern I have often fallen into. I tend to stay up very late because I am in fact quite productive, especially from about 11:00pm until about 3:00am or so (less productive in the early evening for some reason). This means however, that I am usually not up very early in the morning.
On the otherhand, the earlier in the morning that I get up (and I mean actually out of my bed, showered, and out of the house) the more productive I tend to be - and the better I usually feel. My best days typically are days when I am up around dawn, actually eat breakfast, and get on with my day.
Clearly this does not work well when staying up and not getting to sleep until 2 or 3 in the morning.
Probably there is a schedule for me that involves strategic napping which would work very well, but so far I have not found it.
When I do, I will share the secret...
6/25/2002 10:03:00 PM
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Reading
Well last night I read an interesting story by Nancy Kress which I got from SciFiction. On the website it is spread over two pages, so I printed it out and read it over my late night dinner.
In printing it, I printed the first page, then the second page (which were each many paper pages long). Because of this the second page came off the printer on top of the first. Not noticing this, I stapled it and left my office.
I mention all of this because the second half of the story was better, I think, than reading the first and second parts together. What was eluded to and hinted at, ver well I thnk, in the second half, was in fact covered in great detail in the first half.
It is an interesting observation for me - may tell something about my changing tastes, but the second page worked extremely well for me because it just lept right into the middle of the story and then pulled you along (with some minor rough patches), there was much to "figure out" but it was all clear in the end, and then final end hinted (but did not reveal) at some very neat ideas about Alien/Human contact.
It makes me wonder whether I should do something similar myself, take a story that I think is complete and look to lop off the beginning - or at least consider starting the tale later in the story.
6/25/2002 12:52:00 PM
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Sunday, June 23, 2002
Writing here, not writing there
Just got back from Mary Anne's potluck - lots of fun, great food, wonderful conversation, great people - and I am feeling inspired to write - so while this is indeed writing, it is not that productive of writing, so I will try to leave here quickly, take a computer with me (here is my office - have I mentioned I almost never access the web from home these days - not sure if this is a good or a bad habit of mine, at least not access via anything other than my cell phone, which severely limits the usability)
Tonight I want to really write - I promised myself I would write some yesturday, but that did not in fact occur - not for any great reason other than I got distracted on the Internet (hey, it happens).
I want to write a story, not just thoughts or note or ideas, but actually try to write a idea, complete with the building up of tension from the beginning to the end (and with an end, this is very important, many things that I write do not have ends, at least not yet - I tend to write them as if a play, writing the scenes one following the other without knowing precising where it is all leading or where it will end up.
In conversation this afternoon I also mentioned my desire to turn the novel I am working on into a movie script - this may in fact be a highly productive approach for me to start taking - it forces me to cut the scenes to their essenses, and it will force me to resolve the dilemnas that I have set up - and I think that the movie as whole would be both and interesting story, visually attractive, reasonable to actually film, and compelling as a story arc. I mentioned that the trailers would be an element that I would also write - I think that this is, perhaps, where I will start - writing the trailers.
In the course of seeing the movie, the trailers would probably all be shown prior to the start of the film - they would each offer something about what is going on, and would drop hints of what is to come, but they would very importantly all be original scenes and viewpoints, they would not be showing parts of the film before people saw the film itself.
Not because my film will have only a few key scene, or that my film would have "secrets" but rather because I feel this is the way to tell stories - not to let the punchlines (visual and/or verbal) out before telling the story.
Also I believe strongly in the concept of "in situ" scoring, that is, anything that the audiance is hearing corresponds with songs or sounds that the characters are hearing - so rather than be a soundtrack over the story, the music is a crucial part of the tale.
This, in the case of my novel, will allow me to have some very cool combinations of sounds - from techno/alt-rock in my modern sections, to hippie music in the sections in the 60's, to great bands and other old classics for the scenes in the 1940's, to live music of various ethnicities in the 1870's (the fiddler playing while a fire rages is an image I can see),
Well more on that when I have written it - my goal tonight is to write a standalone tale, or at least a self-contained one, possibly as part of something else I am wroking one, but possibly just all by itself.
6/23/2002 07:53:00 PM
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Saturday, June 22, 2002
Dreams and Mosquitoes oh my oh my.
Last night, well to be fully truthful, this morning as I did not get to bed until almost five, I had a very cool dream, one that I hope will come true some day. Now, if only I could remember the full details...
In the dream, I was having a meal with a bunch of people, including a publisher. The publisher had somehow seen some chapters of a book that I was writing and decided to buy a whole series from me, for a very large advance. Okay, so this is truly a dream, but it was so much fun in the dream, and whats more, there was something in there that I do hope to use - and the idea of selling the book(s) well thats a bonus.
I really should be in the habit of keeping a computer or at least a notebook near my bed for nights (or days) such as today. In the dream I went through a very complexly imagined series, not at all like either of the novels I am in fact currently working on. Even the overall tone of what I can recall seeing of my writing in the dream was not the style that I have been using (which may be my subconcious telling me to consider some changes in my writing?)
It was just such a cool dream, and so unlike what my dreams have been for many years - which is why I make note of it.
In part I am sure it because I have been hanging around so many writers, which is a very good thing, but it is also a mental shift for me to dream about myself.
Perhaps this is unique to me, but I do not generally dream about myself (okay, we're leaving aside waking fantasies for the moment) - rather my dreams tend to be mini-movies with complex stories, often multiple characters and almost always camera angles - that is, my dreams tend not to be from the perspective of one character but tend to be of movies or stories happening to someone else - very rarely at least in the past few years - have I dreamt dreams specifically and clearly about myself.
Also, my dreams do not normally include my friends, but this dream did (I won't however name names) - my friends were there and offered congrats etc in the course of the dream.
My thoughts have been turning towards not just finding time to write, but actually thinking about what I am writing and why I am writing it. I know that within me there are many stories to tell, that I can string words together (and even sometimes thoughts), that I have perspectives and views that are unique (and hopefully interesting), and that I should be able to distill from the readings that I have done and liked a sense of how to create and tell stories that people will want to read and experience.
I also know that my interests being what they are, that I will probably cross genres and mediums in the course of creating and telling my stories - I tend to think in a very visual manner, though my writings may not always do my visions justice, so I know that I will want to create not just stories or books, but also visual versions of these tales - whether that means plays, tv shows, or movies I am not certain.
In a great conversation I had last night with a friend we talked about writing and many other things. She suggested to me that an advantage of mastering short stories is that they offer a means of getting quick feedback and input - that over time getting multiple feedbacks on many short stories will help point to your blind spots and problem areas on which you should work. This is not something I had considered before, but then I have been writing into a vacumn for the past many years - most of what I have written has been unread by anyone (if you are interested in reading some of it, drop me an email) - this is very much like working without a net.
On the other hand however, there are some large sections of my writings which have been read by many people over the past few years - these are my letter writings, especially to online discussion groups such as Minciu Sodas where I have frequently written three or more long messages in single day. These have been read for content, not for writing quality - so the feedback has been towards my ideas and less towards how I convey them - though I do seem to have had an effect on at least some of my readers which is a very satisfying event indeed.
My impulse also is to write to tell somewhat complex stories, usually stories that I myself do not know until I complete them, that is, I set up the scene and the characters, but then in my writing I am learning what will happen and who the characters are - the times when I have had a plan of what I want to cover I have found my energy for writing much diminished.
Tonight I think that I will write for a few hours at the Starbucks near my house (perhaps also while doing a few loads of laundry - my major weekend chore, though I may do that tomorrow morning while preparing food for the potluck). In my writing tonight I will try to write from the impulse that inspired my dream - that is, write something (perhaps as a part of something I have already begun) that is deliberately intended to be read and sold - this is very different from my other writings which have been frequently inwardly focused and not at all clearly meant for others to read and buy.
We shall see if I can recapture the magic that I sensed in my dream.
6/22/2002 11:10:00 PM
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Friday, June 21, 2002
Friday.
The start of a busy weekend, and the continuation of a busy week - a very fun and good but busy week.
Last night I attended a party by a group called EuroCircle - interesting crowd, for future reference, parties with a bunch of Europeans don't really get started until late at night and many hours after they were scheduled to start - next time, eat first, then go to the party. But I had a good time and ended the evening with a nice dinner and conversation with a friend.
This weekend I will be very busy, which is a good thing - just don't quite know when I will get various errands I need to complete finished - but better that than nothing to do. What I am enjoying about this fairly sudden shift in my life (from very solitary to not so solitary much of the time) is that I am keeping up with my other tasks, still have time alone, but have been spending more time with friends both old and new than I have in many months - we'll see how the rest of the summer goes, but it is off to a great start.
I was up very early this morning to watch the US vs. Germany game - sorry to see that the US lost, but it was a fun game and they played well. What's more, it was a weird experience of watching it alone, but not alone. During the intermission, I went down the street to get coffee and something for breakfast - I was not alone, there was a mini rush at Seatle's Best as others who were watching the game as well also ventured forth for coffee - it was fun to hear people around me talking about the game and watching it - a communal experience, but still one I spent at home going through my morning routines etc. I bought some Bananna bread from a local bakery, very good - I'll probably bring it to Mary Anne's potluck on Sunday if I have not finished it by then.
Off now to try to focus on some work items for the afternoon - have some calls to return, people to track down and catch up with, and some writings I have been promising myself to finish but have not - which I need to get done.
On the writing front, I had an observation recently, one which I may serious explore in a new piece of writing. My generation, that is people born in the early 70's (using micro-generations i.e. every 5 years or so) is probably the last generation that seriously remembers an assumption that the world would be destroyed in World War III. I remember childhood fantasies of how I would survive a nuclear attack, how to forage and scavenge items, I remember the seeming inevitability of war in the future, war that would blow everything up.
Not really all that positive perhaps, but my observation is that this changed somewhere around the time of the fall of the Berlin Wall etc - we are now living in a very different world, still have plenty of scary elements, but that the nightmares and futures of today's children are different than those of my generation (or at least specifically me).
I'm not sure how I will incorporate this thought into my writings, but something along these lines may in fact help inform and characterize my primary character in my novel, who is of a similar generation to myself - and who through the time travel in my novel has yet another unique perspective on the changes in popular culture and popular assumptions about the future (and about the past).
6/21/2002 11:46:00 AM
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Wednesday, June 19, 2002
My Nerve.com Personals
Okay - so you probably recognize the photo... not sure just how wise this is... but hey it can't hurt now can it?
6/19/2002 09:30:00 PM
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Plans - For the weekend...
I have just sent out an email to a bunch of people, probably missing many, inviting them (at rather short notice I admit) to join me in attending the MCA's Summer Solstice celebration this weekend. It is an amazing event, lots of fun, and should be a good time. I missed it last year, but have enjoyed it in previous years. Who knows if anyone can join me.
If interested in meeting me - the plan per my email is - try to arrive at 9:30pm (possibly 8:30 if I can to see some classical Indian Dance), but to meet people if not coordinated at 10:30 by the glowing Labyrinth in the Plaza. I also plan on trying to attend the breakfast in the morning at 8:00am, whether by staying up all night or by sleeping and returning is still up in the air. If you are reading this, but did not get my email, drop me an email and we can coordinate (my email is linked from my name on the left)
6/19/2002 03:31:00 PM
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Wednesday, a quiet morning, both the early morning after returning home from the wonderful dinner Mary Anne prepared for me last night. I sat up for a few hours thinking about our conversation, and again this morning before arriving here at work I was doing much thinking about my plans for the summer.
My first personal goal is to get out more, do more things with more people, and not just business networking events where I am in a suit and tie, with a nametag, and am collecting business cards. Mary Anne's upcoming potluck this weekend is a good start, the benefit I will be working the night before is another. Either later this month, or at least a couple of times in July I will also be planning a number of events to do with friends.
The key factors are: easy to get to for everyone, cheap (or free), a variety of stuff to do (across the different events), and events that could encourage conversations, meals, etc after, during, or before. One that I am already planning is to get a group together to listen to Anne Harris when she is playing at the Borders in Evanston in July. Great music, free event, afternoon in downtown Evanston - all characteristics of what I am looking for - those who want can sit around talking and then perhaps continue over dinner somewhere on the north side.
Events I am thinking of, in no particular order:
Taste of Chicago and/or Fourth of July Fireworks;
Men in Black II - seeing it soon after it comes out;
next installment of Lord of the Rings (fall/early winter);
other upcoming summer movies;
Chicago International Film Festival (possibly multiple screenings);
DOC films summer series?;
First Friday art gallery openings;
Summer Solstice celebration at the MCA (museum open 24 hours);
Peggy Notabart Nature Museum (to see the butterfly garden) and then perhaps a picnic in Lincoln Park
Air and Water Show;
OZ Festival;
"Too Much Light Makes the Baby go Blind" - at the NeoFuterium - late night comedy, inexpensive theater
Dinner party at my place (forcing me to clean)
Barbeque somewhere - I'll cook if friend can provide the grills and baked foods;
Around the Cayote art festival (whenever it is happening - not sure of the date);
Free day at Art Museum (Thursdays? they also stay open late that same day ...)
the day that the Chicago Symphony center is open for 24 hours (winter?)
the day that the Old Town School of Music is open for 24 hours (also winter? tons of fun! all types of music, very cheap, drumming circles and more)
Getting out of Chicago to someplace where at night stars can be seen - and having a late night barbeque and bonfire (preferably someplace not too far, cheap to stay are)
Bristol Rennaisance Festival sometime this summer? (okay not sooo cheap..)
Probably enough there to keep busy... and hopefully more to come.
I am also trying to figure out about my body - my mental image of myself is still, even now, of the skinny, scawny, physically weaker than everyone else kid that I was in high school and even into college. However clearly this is not an accurate self image (but then who has one) - I am not a small man - 5' 11", not as tall as my dad, but close.
My weight is something I am always puzzled by, my ankles are skinny, my calves are large (but all muscle), my upper legs are also mostly muscle. My qaist and stomach are clearly the area that needs to lose some pounds - which would be a very good thing - but even so, I will never be very slender as I have bones that are wide. My upper body - well loosing some weight would cut the roundness of my face and neck. My arms too are like my legs somewhat odd - my forearms actually almost have muscle definition, but my biceps while strong could clearly be more defined.
All this said, I am not one for weightlifting and indeed great amounts of exercise - not exactly sure why, but somehow it feels (at a very deep level) to me like wasted time and energy - that there are many other things I would rather be doing - and yes, I know intellectually that it is a "good thing", and that people seem to enjoy it etc - but it is probably in part at least related to my general strong dislike of anything associated with modifications of the brain.
I.e. I have a deep seated dislike (which is too weak of a word really) for drugs of any sort - wether drinking, smoking, or indeed even aspirin I find the concept of taking something to change who I am deeply troubling. Indeed I frequently have a moral discussion with myself over the fact that I drink coffee. If I did not need to once in while use an inhaler for my asthma or take Claratin for my allergies, I would live a life nearly completely drug free.
Yes the scientist in me appreciates the powerful effects of medicine, and I know at one level that all these natural substances have been consumed by people for millenia - especially alchohal - but on another level I very much never, ever, want to not be in full control of myself.
For one, I would not accept anything less than full responsibility for all of my actions - so I make a conscious choice not to drink more than one glass or bottle if I am drinking at all. So I avoid all other drugs.
I am a 28 year old American male, of Irish and Jewish descent, not particularly religious at all, and I have never once been drunk.
For a minor outpatient surgery I was once "under" for the procedure (something I am still annoyed at, but clearly had to happen). For dental work I have had novacaine, and after all four of my wisdom teeth were pulled in one operation, I was given a presciption for painkillers and told to take some - however I did not take any of the prescription painkillers but did in fact take some Tylenols (I think, could have been aspirin but I don't think so).
I may have about 5 or 6 other times in my life taken a painkiller, perhaps a few more times as child when it was a liquid tylenol or the like for a time I was home sick.
But for the most part I do not take anything.
I do wonder why this is such an important issue for me, why it is so core to my self-identity. My sister and her boyfriend have long conversations with my parents about wine, beer, and various other drinks. I have perhaps one glass of wine with dinner (which I often don't finish) and am then left out of the conversation.
At some very deep level I don't "get" the attraction of being out of control. I don't get the attraction of being drunk or high.
To bring this back to exercise, which is where I started, I suspect that at some level the talk that "exercise makes you feel good" or phrases like "a runners high" or "after a few weeks you want to exercise" or "you get hooked on it" etc are all phrases that are so loaded with meaning for me that they completely and utterly make me want to avoid it all together - I do NOT want to be addicted to anything, I do not want to want anything - indeed the concept is deeply worrying and troubling to me.
Yes, clearly this it not entirely a "good" attitude - and one I should be able to overcome. But is a very real concern of mine. At some level I know that I have the potential to be addicted to things - that I fall easily into habits and could be at risk of using something as crutch - so rather than risk that at all, I avoid the substances entirely - I never want to have the temptation.
I have certainly considered - why have I completely avoided ever being drunk. Certainly it would have been easy at somepoint, whether in college or after (never saw drinking throughout all of my high school, nor anyone ever even talking about taking drugs) but somehow too I did not.
Anyway, I hope I have not offended my readers, but it is something that I keep thinking about, one of the many things about myself that I still wonder about.
I do plan on some modifications to my eating, and while I will keep to doing lots of walking, especially on the weekends, I am also looking for some other type of exercise that I can do - preferably something that I can combine with another activity that I want to do as well (probably some form of exercise that I can do while also reading - which is basically what I spend most of my time doing in any case - somehow writing and exercise seems an unlikely combination). I would be open to the possiblity of doing something social while exercising - so perhaps playing a sport or just having someong to exercise with, but too it feels like too much of a hassle to coordinate, indeed the last time I tried this it never happened because each time we tried we missed each other due to scheduling changes.
My current thought is to use my building's cycling machine - probably either in the mornings before work, or very late at night in place of my current habbit of watching very bad television - if I can indeed get some reading done at the same time it won't be too difficult, and if I am also modifying my eating habits to cut calories a bit, hopefully the combination will be a noticiable weight loss by the end of the summer (yeah, just in time for Chicago winter when everyone is all covered up anyway...)
My goal is to fit back into my size 36 pants - should be doable I hope
6/19/2002 01:40:00 PM
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Tuesday, June 18, 2002
Tuesday, my birthday. I ate a very late dinner last night (well this morning as well), so my first minor celebration of my birthday was chatting with the people I know at the cafe where I ate, mentioned to them that it was my birthday.
As I did this, it was on my way out, the waitress said "You should have said something earlier, would have given you a dessert or a free drink."
Perhaps, but somehow something with in me did not want that, on the one hand I certainly like getting free stuff, but on the other hand, much of the time I don't take all the discounts I might be able to get, don't strive for the free stuff I might be able to wrangle/pursuade someone to give me - and I am not sure why this is.
I have been thinking alot about my life, as I do always around my birthday. I have lived on my own for the past six years, literally with only a few weeks of exceptions I have spent every night alone in my apartment or condo. I wonder whether I am learning habits that will be increasingly hard to break in the future, all the little habits of life alone.
Life moves at very different speeds, somehow it feels as if for the past five years or more my life has been moving very quickly, lots of movement, lots of "stuff" that passes me by, but at the same time more undone than done in many respects.
Tonight I will be having dinner with my friend Mary Anne and perhaps her cousin. It is really great to have friends in town to spend time with.
This morning my very good friend Rebecca called to wish me happy birthday, not a bad way to wake up at all, but also bittersweet. She lives in New York now and now has a life seperate from me, a boyfriend of 8 months, a new car, and soon a new job. We are all I guess growing up and becoming adults.
More later I hope, the sun is out, the weather is nice, for my birthday I plan on a nice tasty not too rushed lunch.
6/18/2002 01:31:00 PM
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Monday, June 17, 2002
Monday morning.
I stayed up this morning until too early watching the US win at the World Cup. I am not a huge soccer fan, but I am one. My two emotional connections to sports are to Soccer and College Football. Soccer because I played it as a youth and enjoyed it, and College Football (specifically Notre Dame football) because of the all the games I attended with my father growing up. To some extent professional football, mostly because of memories of the Chicago Bears in 1985 and watching the superbowl with childhood friends on their televisions (because I did not have a TV at my house at that time)
I managed to get to one of the World Cup games eight years ago when some were played here in Chicago, it was a birthday present to me from my then roommate - very cool. I'm glad that I can say I have attended a World Cup game.
While I do listen to and keep track of sports to some degree, I do not have a very emotional tie to sports. In large part because I was not on sports teams in high school, indeed far from it - I was the captain of the school Chess Team for three years, and a member of many of the other academic teams.
Growing up without a television has made me an anomoly in US society, especially for someone of my generation. I do not have the viseral connection to TV, to common TV shows and histories, or to the rythmns of the community that are set by TV. My childhood was one of reading books, libraries, games - both "official" and ones I created, and listening to the radio. TV was something I saw very rarely, at random intervals, and at other people's houses. I did not see it in long bursts, nor did I watch enough to know what the shows where, let alone to memorize them.
Life in my house growing up was not dictated by "prime time" or by when the "tv news" was on, indeed to this day I do not know when either of those events are, still my watching of TV is mostly at random intervals without it being a regularly scheduled part of my life.
It certainly impacts my attachment to sports, I did not grow up watching Baseball on TV, or watching other sports, even my football viewing was mostly just the superbowl and occasional live college games.
Last night I was seated next to a group of people in a coffee shop I frequent, they were all near my age, perhaps a few years younger. I knew one of them from a role playing game we had both been involved in years ago, but had not seen her in about two years. Their conversation was wide ranging, and I did not catch all of it. But in listening, I heard many portions that made it clear that they shared bonds of identiy via a common childhood of watching the same cartoons, they talked in shorthand about them, and they were discussing as a topic of conversation which cartoon character they identified with (Allvin? of the "Chipmunks" was a favorite).
I have an intellectual understanding of who that is, a memory of annoying music, and a scattering of images from probably having seen the cartoon a handful of times in my life, but I clearly have a very different understanding of it than they have.
At times, indeed most of the time, I feel cut off from America and American society. I am American, born here and have lived here all of my life, but at the same time I do not grasp at a very fundemental level much that my fellow Americans do, and how they view the world. In my life this has manifested itself in many different ways - I still don't "get" how dating works - I'm still shaky on the whole process; I did not "get" much of what happens for most in High School or indeed in college - in High School I NEVER was somewhere with drinking or drugs - never crossed my mind.
My approach to college and my career also has been unconventional, I have not done the College, internships, job path - still don't "get" that approach to life at some fundemental level, there is something about that whole approach I don't understand.
Anyway, more on this topic later - I have added YACCS comments to my blog - will play around with them as see if I like them - tell me if you do.
6/17/2002 10:46:00 AM
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Friday, June 14, 2002
Okay - Chicago strikes again. It was sunny, now it is that dark before and during the storm. We have turned the lights in the office to full, and I am now waiting for a lull in the storm to run to the post office and to get lunch. If it does not come soon then I will brave the moisture and get a bit wet (but my sister's present may wait for a drier day to be sent.)
6/14/2002 01:37:00 PM
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Flag day.
I always remember Flag Day, because it is also always my sister's birthday. This year I guess more people than usual remember the holiday, the Sun Times here in Chicago once again ran a center section with a pullout flag to be displayed.
The weather here is sunny, but still cool, not a bad mix at all, though I do not expect to spend a lot of time outdoors today. In a few minutes I will be running out for lunch and to prepare and send my sister's birthday present. I am giving her a collection of spices, almost all stuff she requested: fine French sea salt and black peppercorns which were both requests. To that I added dried Jalapeno pieces since she asked for additional but unique dried hot peppers and some French seafood demi-glace - with recipies which I suspect she will enjoy preparing and cooking with.
Not much else today, I have lots of various items to take care of at the moment - mostly work related, but some personal, and I did not get much writing done last night. My plan had been to write for a few hours, but instead I caught up on my reading, which was useful but mostly work stuff, important but not very relaxing. Tonight I hope to get much more writing done, I am meeting a friend for lunch tomorrow and hope to have a rewrite of a story he is helping me with to share with him - he gave me some very good critiques of what was a very rough version of the story, I have made many of the changes he suggested, but I have many more to go, and the story is not yet complete either.
6/14/2002 01:11:00 PM
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Thursday, June 13, 2002
Rain, sun, rain.
Hot. Cold. Hot.
Chicago is a city at the moment with weather with mental defects, weather that does not know the season, or if it does, weather that does not care whether it is consistant. Sure it is anthropromorpisizing (sp?) but here in hicago you fell as if you must when it comes to the weather. Today, like yesturday it is cold here in Chicago. Two days ago it was hot, yesturday I did not wear a jacket thinking that it would be warm. I was wrong.
Today I wore a jacket, but forgot my umbrella and in any case, my jacket is not quite heavy enough.
The office is quiet at the moment, not many people here, and most of my work for the past few days has been online and virtual - somehow it feels less real, but the conversations, sales pitches, emails, and job leads are very real, just not very loud.
I owe a present to my sister for her birthday tomorrow, will be shopping for it tonight and mailing it tomorrow, I talked to her the other day so she knows basically what I will be getting her, and knows that it will probably be a bit late. She and her boyfriend, are, like all of my family, very good cooks and quite into cooking. So for her birthday I will be sending her some really good spices from a great local store (The Spice House) and I will be looking for a mortar and pestle there as well, one large enough for the preparation of sauces such as pesto.
For my birthday I think she may be putting together a sample cd with music I should be listening to, she has much better tastes in music than I do - so I will enjoy her suggestions. I tend to listen to almost anything and generally mostly the radio, only rarely do I buy a cd, let alone listen to one. Not sure what else, if anything she will send me for my birthday, but it is fun to communicate with my sister as an adult to an adult (okay, okay we've both been adults for years... but hey better now than never...)
6/13/2002 03:48:00 PM
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Wednesday, June 12, 2002
Here is an article I recently wrote as part of an online discussion group that is part of Minciu Sodas an online virtual lab that I am part of. It is part of my ongoing discussion there about my philosophy, I may over time post more of that here, or at least links to my contributions to the discussions.
My responce below:
[continueing a discusion about determinism vs. non-determinisim and Stephen Wolfram's new science, among other topic. The full thread can be found here: Minciu_Sodas_En on Yahoo Groups]
One - if you can SEE the whole pattern - and know where in the cycle to generate it what you see is, then perhaps you can both work backwards and forward... but again, only in the circumstances that the rules are comprehensive - and that the rules themselves do not generate randomness.
Neither of my above points are trivial, furthermore it is non-trivial to place a particular element within a pattern.
Say that a set of rules generates binary patterns, Wolfram cites an example that generates a pyramid like pattern - given a fragment of the pattern (1,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,1 etc) it is not possible to place it precisely.
It may not be possible to even know if you have a complete "line" of the pattern or not.
And this is from a simple case - image the rules underlying say biological interactions - such as my example of the creation of a seashell - how do you KNOW that you have the complete shell?
Especially when you are dealing with humans and human interactions and human will, I am strongly non-deterministic in that there is nothing that I can envision that could determine all actions of all people - at an individual level (which is where will and choice resides).
I can see systems that can be highly accurate in predicting the behavior of groups and trends within groups - but I would argue that not only will there ALWAYS be outliers and anomalies (people who acted in seemingly unpredictable manners) - but that this is essential to what it means to be human. Furthermore that it is not possible to "correct" the formulas to take into account these people's actions as well - rather it points to some fundamentally flawed assumptions about a deterministic viewpoint.
One - that external to the individual it is possible to completely understand the individual - that by somehow taking measurements or noting externally viewable or measurable "facts" the sum of the person can be learned completely - I would argue that this is not possible - that no matter how closely the individual's life is documented, there will always be a separation between what is externally viewed and measured, and what is internally experienced.
An example. I am color blind, nearsighted, and astigmatic. How I see the world (without my glasses) is extremely different than how "normal" people see it. Make all the notes you want to, take all the measurements and recordings of what I saw etc - you will NEVER measure precisely how I saw and experienced something. I can try to explain it, but it is literally the case that some things I see you will not - and much that you (you being someone with more "normal" vision) see I can not and do not (and did not).
Have you taken those colorblindness tests with numbers that "appear" in the midst of a pattern of seemingly random colors? In most cases - I can not see
those numbers.
What then is my experience of seeing?
Based on many factors - I am a young man, highly computer literate, single, have a decades long love of games and computers - I "should" be an avid computer and console gamer.
I am not.
In large part because I am also color blind - and so the experience of many of these games is deminished by text I can not easily read, by enemies I can not differentiate from foes, controls I can not easily read.
But digging further - you can look into my past deeper, try to delve more into what "makes me tick" - and you will find contradiction upon contradiction - in fact at many times I might seem to be wildly different people (the "math science nerd" on one hand, then a "history guy", then a "writer", etc) - and I am indeed all of these and none of these.
The solution, which the determinists tend to ignore and even deny, is that I have made, and make many choices about myself and mylife - and that in accepting that responsibility I choose different paths and different ways.
More later,
6/12/2002 08:37:00 PM
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Salads are yummy.
Last night I prepared what I think will quickly become a signature dish for me - possibly what I will bring to the next potluck I attend. A salad of mixed greens, vine ripened tomatoe, pecans, yellow raisins, and a purple onion in a balsamic vinagrette dressing prepared with extra virgin first pressing olive oil and basil.
Onto this salad after it was well tossed, I added lobster pieces (well fake lobster pieces) which I had cooked in a sauce of - olive oil, garlic powder, cinnamon, worchester sauce, and korean barbeque sauce with some chili peppers.
A very tasty salad with a nice mix of sweet, hot, and tangy - it needed just a touch of salt and pepper and was then extremely tasty - so tasty in fact that I may make another variation of it for my dinner tonight.
I enjoy cooking - it is a fun and satisfying creative outlet - but I am torn because often eating out is one of my few social activities of the day. At least eating out I talk with someone other than myself, if only to order the meal. In the summer in my neighborhood there are lots of sidewalk seating at the local restaurants, often while eating there I see friends and neighbors.
Now back to work...
6/12/2002 01:31:00 PM
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Tuesday, June 11, 2002
June is the month of celebrations in my family - my sister's birthday, then my birthday, then my parent's aniversary all seperated by only four days between each celebration.
This year will be a quiet year for celebrating - my sister is in NYC, my parents will be on the west coast for both birthdays, and then my parent's aniversary falls on the same day as a major charity benefit that my mom is organizing (and at which I will be bartending - rather amusing, that.)
Like most things in my family, food is a prominant aspect to our lives and our celebrations. The tradition, started back when we were very young, is that the birthday person chooses the restaurant (or the menu) for dinner that night. Rarely anything in excess, but always someplace special and good. When we were much younger I would often choose The Ground Round - a small, local competitor to "Chuckey Cheeses", that is to say an America place with barbeque ribs (which is what I always ordered) and lots of games for us kids to play.
However, I was too tall to ever play in what was clearly the coolest of the game - the room full of plastic balls, this was invented just a few years after I had grown too tall to be allowed inside.
It is the small things that you remember.
Now, the tradition has usually be to pick great restaurants here in town, usually not insane places such as Charlie Trotters, but amazing places such as Yoshi's Cafe, Printer's Row, or the like.
This year, I have no plans, my birthday may pass with no celebration and no one to share it with.
One year I was in Israel for my birthday, it was the first week of a seven week long archealogical dig that I was on, I was in a new country surrounded by 100 people I did not know. All alone that year it was a tough birthday. There was one other historian on that trip, about five archaelogical students, and about 90 divinity school students with whom I shared nothing.
They were mostly Evangelical Christians.
I am an atheist who does not believe in God. If pressed I aknowledge my Jewish heritage and am more Jewish than I am Catholic (which is how I was raised, nuns and all).
Indeed, one roommate of mine there (we slept four to a room) had the annoying conversational habit of saying "You know. The bible says..."
Every other sentance.
Grating even to some of the others who were fellow travelers of his.
To be fair, many of them were not like that, and kept their preaching to a minimum, indeed there were many who were intelligent and fun to talk to, though only in short spurts. I spent my weekends after the first weekend, traveling Israel on my own, staying at youth hostels, and exploring the history of the place. The weekends were great, the dig was exhausting and exhillerating.
But that first week, my birthday celebrated alone with strangers was not so great.
A few years ago I was once again travelling on my birthday, this time to England. However, this time rather than celebrating my birthday with strangers, I was lucky to celebrate it with family and friends! My grandfather, his third wife, and one of her children and his family were staying in London at the same time, in a rented flat. I got to visit with them and then go out for dinner at a great italian restaurant. My grandfather gave me a present that I will always treasure, a watch. It is an electric watch (not electronic, it is rather unusual) which is when properlly tuned extremely accurate. With it, he timed the launches of over twenty rocket launches that he worked on.
Yes, my grandfather could be described as a rocket scientist. Well Aeronautical Engineer to be more precise. He designed jets for twenty years, was an early member of Rand Corporation, and then spent twenty years working for Aerospace Corporation designing top secret satalites and other items for the government. How cool is that.
In fact on the walls of one of those three letter agencies there is a plaque honoring my grandfather as a pioneer of space. There are still many of the items he built that he can not talk to us about today.
So his watch that he gave to me was the witness to a slice of our history, a slice that few people were able to participate in.
This year I do not know what I will do for my birthday. I am always contemplative about this time of year, I am getting older, no longer the youth that I was, that I still think of myself as being. Rather than being the youngest in every group, as I have been since the 2nd grade (well since the 3rd grade when I skipped into it in the middle of the year after moving). I am now approaching being the old one in some circumstances.
In some respects I am successful.
But in many more I am left wondering, I am not who I always thought I would be.
For one, I am without a degree (by the age of 25 my "plan" had been to have a PhD like my father's).
For another, I am single and not married - though I never thought about this much, somehow I always figured by this point in my life I would be married, possibly even a father. I am now much older than my mom was when she got married, and approaching older than she was when I was born.
But more on that another day. For now, errands to run and a business to strive to maintain.
6/11/2002 05:03:00 PM
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ShannonClark's Journal
Another online journal system - but one that I do not use as frequently as here. I am proud of my five digit Slashdot ID, the realy geeky part of it being that I had been a Slashdot reader for months prior to getting it, so I probably could have had an even lower id.
6/11/2002 02:42:00 PM
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The Joel on Software Forum - PIMs
A recent online discussion that mentions my company - kinda neat to see that people search for a company I have started and refer to it - now if I can just generate some sales from this referal.
6/11/2002 12:45:00 PM
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Monday, June 10, 2002
Monday.
First sun, but then in Chicago's typical manner - a storm that came and went in an hour, hopefully gone now before I venture forth for lunch.
This weekend was sunny, warm, and wonderful. It started with an evening with my friends Mary Anne, Jennifer and her husband Rich, and other friends eating and talking into the evening - lots of fun, something I have missed these past years. It is great to have friends back in town!
I even got some writing in on Friday after the party, wrote a bit on a political story I am writing - definitely science fiction - an atheist wins the Presidency...
On Saturday and Sunday I went to the Old Town and Wells St. Art fairs - two fairs, both a block or two from my house, and always on the same weekend - makes for a wekend when I avoid moving my car, and a weekend of lots of people in the neighborhood (by lots I mean many tens of thousands!) But given the weather the viewing was great (and the art not bad either)
Met up with some random friends on the street, but mostly just explored the fair on my own. Spent much of Saturday afternoon sitting in the local Starbucks (a few thousand sq.ft. on the corner, not a typical Starbucks) reading Ken McLeod's Cassini Division. It is not as good as his The Star Fraction and I am still not certain whether I like it or not (but at more than halfway through I should finish it tonight). Since I am writing my own political SF story it is very interesting reading, especially to keep track of what I do and do not like - what I don't like is the sensation of disconnect from challenge, "big" tasks take a paragraph or a line, and many pages are spent on stuff that frankly gets somewhat boring. Also I am fairly certain that while I agree with some of his politics, I am in more disagreement than agreement with him - which is itself a challenge as well.
Sunday was a fairly lazy day, but I did make it back to the fairs and caught a truly amazing musician. Anne Harris, who was so good that I strangely enough bought her CD - something I rarely do. Her music is hard to describe, a mix of Celtic, Fok, African, Pop, and other influences. She writes her own songs, and performs them in an amazing live show with electic guitar, electirc bass, drums, and herself playing either electric fiddle, mandolin, or percussion. Someone whom I will try to catch at another performance (also a rarity for me, rare that I am this interested in a musician).
Off now to lunch and then a day of work stuff until this evening - when I plan on doing more cleaning of my condo, a few hours of writing, and catch up on my backlog of reading.
6/10/2002 01:08:00 PM
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Friday, June 07, 2002
Friday, the sun is shinning, the sky is blue, and though the office is cool I am having a great day.
Last night I attended a signing at Stars Our Destination which turned into a reading as well. Both authors are friends, and many other writers in Chicago attended. The conversation was wide ranging and great fun. We talked about favorite books and authors, about writing, about academia, in short an intelligent and interesting conversation with people who moments ago were complete strangers - this is what I am looking for when I leave my home or office!
The evening was a comedy of electronic failures, after dinner and good curry at an Evanston Thai restaurant (thanks for the recommendation) I took myself to Kafein, a wonderful local coffeehouse that stays open late, lets you sit and study for hours, and serves great drinks... I opened up my laptop and prepared to write the many thoughts and ideas that had been sparked by the invigorating experience of meeting with fellow writers and holding intelligent conversations. It was not to be.
My keyboard on my laptop has decided to forgoe allowing me to use the "k", ",", "=", "]", and "8" keys.
So, I tried to call Dell to initiate a service call and get my laptop repaired - phase two of my electronic battles...
My cell phone's battery started chirping and beeping at me - and after having gotten the correct number to call with the help of a family memember in front of a computer, I was then unable to get the darn phone system to recognize that I was typing any numbers... just kept repeating the same message over and over and over again... "press 1 for this, Press 2 for that..."
All was not lost however - and before the night was out I did indeed get the process set in motion, and then managed to make it home in time to have a very late night business meeting that bodes well for the future.
While I am writing this on Friday afternoon however, my laptop is still unfixed - no service person from Dell here yet - they implied they might not be here until Monday (so much for "next day service...") so tonight and over the weekend if I want to write I will have to use an external keyboard - one more thing to pack....
Tonight I will be having curry again with my friend Mary Anne - it is such a treat to have friends back in town to do stuff with, to have lunch with, to cook dinner with, this past month has been a wonderful change of pace for me - far more social activities, not just business networking events as my few nights out (not counting hanging out at a local cafe as a "night out")
6/07/2002 04:02:00 PM
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Wednesday, June 05, 2002
Wednesday will be the day for me to shop, at least for vegetables and perhaps fruit. The city of Chicago has a number of Farmer's Markets, a week ago one near my house started. It is every Wednesday from 7:00am until 1:00pm.
This morning it was raining when I went there, so the merchants were all very pleased to see me, a potential customer. They had free coffee (organic and "free trade" if you care) and some free raisin bread that I munched on as I shopped. It would have been a great place to buy a live spice plant, lots of options to choose from, but I have a brown thumb so that is not a good idea. Lots of merchants had various types of greens (the name of this market is Chicago Green Marketplace I think, so that is very appropriate). And for some reason lots of radishes and asparagus.
The asparagus was fresh, but mostly of the rather thick variety that I am not overly fond of, and I was not in the mood for radishes. So this morning all I purchased was one bag of mixed greens with which to make a salad or two over the next few nights.
But as I said, Wednesdays are now my day for shopping for vegetables.
After shopping the marketplace this morning (before 8:00am, very early for me indeed), and getting a bit wet on my way back home to drop off my greens. I decided to sit at Seatle's Best and read for a while, had still more coffee (well caffinated today I am).
It was a good routine, one I have missed these past months, I think I will resume spending more mornings in a coffeeshop, good for my mental attitude, productive in terms of catching up on the dozens of magazines I get each month, and great to be surrounded by people. I even got some productive work done via some phone calls that came in on my cell phone, set up a meeting for later today with a possible client. I also finished two of the many business and trade magazines I get each month, and looked over another enough to know that it is not a high priority on my reading list (this is a very valuable discovery).
Now I have an afternoon looming ahead of me where I need to make lots of calls and write lots of emails for work, then a business meeting and then a networking event this evneing. A simulcast from MIT of a panel of successful entrepreneurs - should be a useful event for me to listen to and learn from.
But what will see me through today is the salad I have planned for dinner tonight, and the writing on my novel that I will do after dinner (probably while doing my laundry in the laundry room tonight). My planned salad is mixed greens, onion, apple, raisins, pecans, and grilled (fake) lobster in a balsamic vinigrette dressing - should be mighty tasty, very quick to prepare, and probably even rather healthy!
6/05/2002 12:35:00 PM
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Tuesday, June 04, 2002
Tuesday is a day of strange noises.
First the office was silent, except for my all too infrequent typing or even rarer phone call. I was the first person in this morning, and I was late.
Then this afternoon the rather strange AC system in my offices decided to kick into what I call the "airplane" mode. As in, it sounds as if there is an airplane taking off above my desk.
If I were here alone, with noone else I would probably connect to an online radio station and blast some techno/industrial noise to keep me company and drown out the AC's hum and the general stillness and silence of a too empty office. However I am not alone here at the moment, rather my employees are here as well, so I am constrained (to a degree) in what I can do.
I have been traversing the web today, reading a lot of interesting sites, and realizing just how much more interesting most other people's lives are than my life is these days. Even in the day to day detritus that populates most web journals my friends have hot tubs, pets, significent others (boyfriends, girlfriends, some of each in a few cases). My friends write about cooking dinner for roommates, about books they are reading and buying, about music they are listening to, about their goals and what they have to do to accomplish them.
Me. My life is on the one hand very dull. On the other, it could be seen from the outside as rather exotic, successful, and interesting, though here on the inside looking at it I would not agree.
Who am I?
I am 27 (but soon to be 28, a birthday I will likely celebrate entirely alone).
I am male. Single (more on that later). I live in Chicago.
Specifically I live in a condo on the north side of Chicago, the same condo I have owned since 1996. But also the same condo that is still only half furnished, lacking in couches, with much still in boxes, and generally a big clutter and annoyance.
I own my own company - which sounds great, however it also means that I am seriously in debt, directly and indirectly own very large sums of money, and will likely be treading water for the next three to five years just to get out of that debt. On the upside, I am a technologist and often computer consultant and can make very decent money when the work is there (which it will increasingly be for the next few years - knock on wood).
I have many talents - playing chess, cooking, picking restaurants, writing, giving massages, listening. But I am also rusty at nearly all of those for lack of a partner or even friends to do them with most of the time.
My friends have drifted away, mostly two-by-two, many moving to the suburbs or out of town, having gotten marreid and in a few cases having started a family. I am still, in the scheme of life and dating back somewhere in high school in terms of my overall dating experience.
But on the other hand many of my friends write erotica and live very complex and exotic lives and have all permutations of relationships. Just not with me.
In college I joked that I was the token straight guy at many of the parties I attended - and while an exageration it was also not far from the truth.
I am very liberal, but I am not a Democrat, as I am also strongly anti-union.
Ah well more on me later - tis easy to write, hard to share, and strange to read perhaps, or perhaps not that strange however unique and unusual I may think my own life is, there are likely many who have similiar problems.
Somehow though I suspect there are few successful, straight, not physically disabled or restrained males my age, in my educational and socio-economic group who have not had a date since Dec of 1998, it being June of 2002 at the moment.
6/04/2002 05:47:00 PM
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Monday, June 03, 2002
This weekend I cooked for my friends Jennifer and Rich. It was their 25th wedding aniversary and they celebrated by throwing a party for their friends, roasting a pig, and inviting us to spend the day with them eating, drinking and talking in their backyard. I cooked many dishes, all of which were quickly eaten!
First an appetizer of baked brie with crushed roasted pecans and currents. Took less time to be finished than it did to prepare, and it only took about 15 minutes to prepare!
Second, a salad with mixed greens, two types of pears, apples (Braeborn), purple onion, roast pecans, and goat cheese in a balsamic vinagrete dressing. The dressing was made with Italian Balasmic, greek first pressing virgin olive oil, and dried basil, I got the porportions just right so the dressing mixed perfectly. I tossed the saled with all the ingrediants but one of the pears and the goat cheese, then I garnished with pear slivers and goat cheese. Very popular salad and a nice mix of tastes, not too sweet, but not a traditional salad either.
Third, I made mashed potatoes from baby red potatoes mashed with french butter, half and half, a couple teaspoons of horseradish with beet juice, and some dried minced green onions. The result is a nice mix of my Jewish and Irish roots, and a very "potatoe" flavored mashed potatoe, very rich, very creamy, but with the skins on and the pink coloring, and the hint of horseradish a very unusual and tasty dish.
Fourth, I made homemade applesauce to serve with the roast pig. The applesauce was made from Red Delicious apples I picked up at a local fruit stand (one large bag for $0.99 can't beat that), as well as five Braeborn apples. I then added some Indonesian cinnamon. The apples were peeled and cored. They were then cooked over medium heat for a time, then brought down to low heat and they simmered away for the afternoon.
Fifth, I baked some Braeborn apples. After washing and coring the apples, I backed them at 350 degrees with a small ammount of butter, cinnamon sticks, and some cloves. A very tasty dish to eat with the roast pig.
Sixth, we turned a pinapple also purchased at the same fruit market into long spears which were then grilled. The trick being that the pinapple was very ripe (and cheap, also $0.99).
All in all one of the most fun cooking experiences I have had in a long time. People kept asking me if I do this for a living either if I were a professional chef or a professional caterer. Might be a fun hobby and weekend occupation for me to consider?
Got some writing in over the weekend, but not too much. You can see more about my ongoing writing at: BIAW which is a writer's challenge where we all challenge each other to finish our novels in a week (well usually in two weeks). The main point being to keep us all writing at a fast pace and not let us have the time to edit what we have written.
6/03/2002 04:48:00 PM
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Tim is another of the people I met at WisCon via Strange Horizons: Tim Pratt's SF Page
6/03/2002 02:42:00 PM
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One of the many people I know from WisCon and Strange Horizons: little monster
6/03/2002 02:38:00 PM
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Sometimes I show up at friend's sites... An Ongoing, Erratic Diary.
This is me helping out the Strange Horizon's folks at WisCon. My pleasure to help my college friend Mary Anne.
6/03/2002 02:25:00 PM
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